Upon our group’s return from our weeklong stay in San Lucas, friends and family bombarded each of us with questions. “What’d you do?” “Was it life-changing?” “How was the food?” As I tried to answer each of these questions some of them easier to respond to than others, I began a much-needed personal reflection of the trip.
I wanted my responses to these questions to be honest and genuine. There’s nothing more frustrating than not being able to articulate what I want to say, and these questions were giving me nothing but trouble so I turned to my journal. Luckily while we had been in San Lucas, we had free time in the afternoon and a superb view from the roof of our hotel, which allowed for some much needed time journaling about my experiences. As I looked through my written journal entries, I found quotes I had jotted down and questions I had asked myself during my stay at the Mission such as, “Am I really making a difference here or is this trip just for me?” These questions of selfishness were something my roommate and I had struggled with at the beginning of the week. We knew the Guatemalans that were in charge of each worksite could be doing the work much better and faster than we could, and we couldn’t reconcile with the idea that the trip seemed to be benefitting us rather than anyone in San Lucas.
When you leave for a service trip, it’s hard to come to terms with the idea that perhaps you aren’t making as big of a difference in the developing country as you first assumed you would make. That was what was eating at us those first few nights. I felt cynical and couldn’t make sense of why I was there to begin with.
However, as we worked alongside the Guatemalans, experienced their generosity and kindness, and learned about their culture first-hand, I began to understand that the relationship I was forming with the community of San Lucas was more important than any work I was helping with. That’s why I’m going back.
I’m preparing to make my home in a new culture from which I have so much to learn. Rather than packing my bags with the anticipation of changing the lives of Guatemalans, instead my focus has shifted to the short-term volunteers I will be working with, helping them to reconstruct their purpose as a volunteer. Rather than them expecting to go to worksites with the intention to get as much done as possible, I hope to help them enter their time in the Mission with new goals of learning and being in community with the incredible people of San Lucas.
I wanted my responses to these questions to be honest and genuine. There’s nothing more frustrating than not being able to articulate what I want to say, and these questions were giving me nothing but trouble so I turned to my journal. Luckily while we had been in San Lucas, we had free time in the afternoon and a superb view from the roof of our hotel, which allowed for some much needed time journaling about my experiences. As I looked through my written journal entries, I found quotes I had jotted down and questions I had asked myself during my stay at the Mission such as, “Am I really making a difference here or is this trip just for me?” These questions of selfishness were something my roommate and I had struggled with at the beginning of the week. We knew the Guatemalans that were in charge of each worksite could be doing the work much better and faster than we could, and we couldn’t reconcile with the idea that the trip seemed to be benefitting us rather than anyone in San Lucas.
When you leave for a service trip, it’s hard to come to terms with the idea that perhaps you aren’t making as big of a difference in the developing country as you first assumed you would make. That was what was eating at us those first few nights. I felt cynical and couldn’t make sense of why I was there to begin with.
However, as we worked alongside the Guatemalans, experienced their generosity and kindness, and learned about their culture first-hand, I began to understand that the relationship I was forming with the community of San Lucas was more important than any work I was helping with. That’s why I’m going back.
I’m preparing to make my home in a new culture from which I have so much to learn. Rather than packing my bags with the anticipation of changing the lives of Guatemalans, instead my focus has shifted to the short-term volunteers I will be working with, helping them to reconstruct their purpose as a volunteer. Rather than them expecting to go to worksites with the intention to get as much done as possible, I hope to help them enter their time in the Mission with new goals of learning and being in community with the incredible people of San Lucas.